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Monday, July 30, 2012

Top Ten Things You Need To Know To Stay In The Know!

10.   Fair is foul; and foul is fair. Looking for a little culture in your life??? The Tragedie of MacBeth started playing in the Shanachie Theater over this past week. It runs through the thirteenth of August and features some of RhyDin's best actors! While you're there, give our love to the SMOKING HAWT theater manager, Charles Nbayu. We're telling you! The sight of him is worth the price of admission alone! As for the play? We're getting word back that the it's pretty good and a couple of the interns and I will be attending next weekend! Fun! Who doesn't love to get all dressed up and go to the theater???

9. Only in RhyDin! Rumor has it that Andu was overheard having a very interesting conversation with the cutie Saffron over how humans separate food from sentient beings. Andu called humans "confusing" and suggested how glad he was not to count himself among their numbers. He seemed to suggest that he did not consider the act of eating human beings either right or wrong. Wow! We bet some of you are now VERY VERY glad he is no longer representing your interests on the GAC (see #5). Saffron took offense to the remarks and quickly suggested that she would be taking them out to the alley! HILARIOUS! Are we here at the Den of Gossip the only ones that would absolutely positively pay top dollar to see Saffron face down Andu??? Yeah, I didn't think so!

8. Frenemies for LIFE! It seems that Riley and Duci agreed to put bros before hos... or sisters before misters... this past week after their mega blow out the week before that over Jochin. Is anyone really all that shocked about Jochin jumping from one relationship to the next? Isn't that sort of his m.o.? Sometimes you women bring it on yourselves! Don't expect any sympathy from us, Duci, when Jochin leaves you for a blonde with a little less sag. Oh, shut up. You know you see it too! I don't know how old Duci is but there are quite a few city miles on those tires if you know what we're saying! Speaking of the EVIL BLONDE ONE, Duci will be facing off against the Den of Gossip's own Barbie next month! Details to come!
7. We Are A Single Woman's 411!  Cooper's back in town, ladies! Thaaaat's right! The cowboy has been seen in the Inn several times over the past week catching up with friends. We hear that Thorn (who is still in the middle of some odd "relationship" with Cove and Mist) was pretty overjoyed to see him as was Harper and Tenacity. He QUICKLY made friends with another hot brunette in new girl, Anna. She's a quiet little thing that our sources have spotted a handful of times in the Inn and since Cooper loves to be surrounded by hot women so it comes as no shock to us that the two were seen chatting together. We do hear that Cooper did mention that he's seeing someone. We imagine that would be Ravie and since they've reached about six months, it's officially long term relationship territory by RhyDin standards! We sure hope Ravie knows better than to let her man hang out in the Inn much without her. The women of RhyDin love themselves some Cooper and Cooper sure does seem to love a pretty face!

6. YOU READ IT HERE FIRST! It seems that our report last week of Candy showing an interest in Jay stirred up some rather interesting news. We got a letter from Jay advising us that he is not dating Candy, has never dated Candy, and NEVER broke up with Sami. In fact, they've evidently been quietly dating for the last four years and are breaking the news HERE first! STICK THAT EXCLUSIVE IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT, GOSSIP WEENIES! The long term couple was quick to tell us that they kept their relationship quiet in the beginning due to respect for Harris who raised Sami with his wife since she was a tween and who initially disapproved due to Sami's age when they first began dating. The news of the pair dating did hit the rumor mill several years ago but it seems news of the breakup that followed was false! Cute!

5. Now You See Him, Now You Don't! This past week Andu Kirost was removed from the Governor's Advisory Council for an undisclosed reason. There's an ongoing investigation but no news is coming out of the Governor's office as usual. Governor Fio rules that place with an iron fist. Finding a leak is awfully hard! It makes us long for the days of Dris and Kitty who were quick to flap their lips about anything you wanted to know! We hear that the Gov is soooo not happy, though. She's a tough cookie and definitely not one we have NO desire to be on her bad side. Good luck to you, Andu. We think you're going to need it!

4. Racing Your Way Around RhyDin! There's flyers all around town advertising an upcoming race. Although, it doesn't seem to be any of the traditional varieties! We hear that teams of no more than four will travel around the realm collecting clues and racing to checkpoints. It appears it will test mental quickness just as much as physical endurance! One team is already in place but there are plenty open spaces. Get your team together and enter by Monday evening. The winning team gets to split 25,000 credits! If that's not motivation enough, I don't know what is!

3. Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend! Fourteen combatants took to the rings last Sunday night to award another diamond! When the dust settled there was a strong final four of Hydra Cup heavy weight Xanth, first timer from the Crew Myria Graziano, reigning Diamond Seirichi, and former Diamond Sartan. Xanth took out Sartan while Myria ended Seirichi's run, leaving Xanth and Myria in the end. The youngest Graziano took the 5-4 win to secure her first Diamond! Myria's often been seen as the least accomplished Graziano but NO MORE! If you're counting, this means the Crew have secured two of the three top titles within the dueling venues. Will they bother making a move on magic??? Considering that Tical recently issued a challenge to Candy for the Tower of Fire, it appears to be a very real possibility!

2. Oh, What Complicated Sexual Lives You All Lead! Our sources spotted Sal in the Inn this past week and, while it's always safe to assume that he's up to no good, it seems that he was in rare form. While he's been with Sin for quite some time, he introduced Cove to Vera as his "lover". Of course, this was in front of Thorn who has been seen getting close with Cove recently. Thorn didn't look very upset but, then again, Cove doesn't seem all that choosy about who is getting his loving. Other than choking on her vodka over it, she just seemed amused by the pair's obviously mutual attraction. Cove and Sin were seen headed upstairs in the Inn for a little bit of... one-on-one time, if you know what we're talking about! Very hot and juicy but at what point does Cove start reaching dirty territory??? He's been an Inn regular for only a couple of weeks and has been linked with a new man/woman ridiculously frequently!

1. And An Ale for the Late Great Robert Kidd. Such sad news coming out of the Kidd family this week. According to our sources within the Watch, Robert suffered a fatal self-inflicted gunshot wound and his body was found on the docks this past week. Evidently there were no signs of any issues in the days leading up to his death and the family is in complete shock. There are no plans, yet, for a public memorial service. However, the family will be covering the cost of drinks for the next two weeks at the Powder Keg Pub located in Dockside, a frequent gathering place of the Kidd family, in Robert's memory. He's survived by his sister, Bridget, and brothers, Stephen (and his wife Diana), Padriq, and Donal. We hear at the Den of Gossip are deeply saddened to hear the news. The city loses one of it's most entertaining cads with the death of Robert. God speed, Robert.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Top Ten Things You Need to Know to Stay in the Know!

10. And With Those Words The Panties Went A-Flying! What words? New guy in town! Not only is he new but he's hot and seems polite. That's enough for most of the women in this town to declare their love on. the. spot. His name? We're sure you're desperate for it. Daniel Jackson. He evidently got stranded here on some sort of mission. We here he looks like a military type which will make the ladies even happier. The interns and I are also quite pleased. With Alain married, there has been a distinct lack of men worthy of really working the women of RhyDin into a lather. There's Kalamere, of course, but he's willing to spread his talents far and wide so no need for any cat fights there. We're hoping there's a real knock down, drag out for this guy! If there's one thing that the women of RhyDin specialize in, it's desperation.

9. Madame, Like You This Play? The Lady Doth Protest Too Much, Methinks! The Fire Witch is going to be piiiiissed! Candy is soooo quick to tell anyone and everyone who will listen that she doesn't date, never dates, wouldn't even THINK of dating! But Jay has been overheard calling her his "ex-girlfriend" in the past (liar, liar, pants on fire, Candy!) and there had been rumors a couple years ago of some sort of involvement between the two of them. There has definitely been tension, particularly with Jay joining Crew. But ANOTHER of Jay's ex-girlfriends, Sami, has popped up recently. We don't exactly remember them dating but evidently they did a couple years ago. Briefly. Rumor has it that Candy gave the girl the fifth degree over her relationship (past and present) with Jay. Maybe Candy's not quite over Jay??? It seems that Sami's not either because she's definitely been seen spending time with him as of late!

8. This Is The Relationship That Just Won't Die! So Jochin is alive. I know, I know. Big freaking whoop. The only thing of note that we know he's done is bed half of the pretty women in RhyDin. Usually the ones with confidence issues. Because, really, the guy has the same IQ of Barbie's arch-nemesis, Duci. And oddly enough, that is exactly who he has been hanging out with as of late! But we're getting ahead of ourselves. It seems that the man who ALWAYS has a pretty thing drinking with him at the bar is accusing his girlfriend, Little Miss Serious Annie-Love Harper, of having some sort of inappropriate soul-binding relationship with her employee, Colt.... who dates her friend, Tenacity. A tangled web they weave, I know. But we're not entirely sure we buy it. Harper? Cheat? She wouldn't even cheat at a board game. But this relationship really needs to die. YOU CAN DO BETTER, LOVE!

7. Don't Hate the Player! Well, well, well. It was only a couple weeks ago that we were reporting that this Cove guy had been spending quite a bit of time with the lovely Lita. They seemed well on their way to being RhyDin's newest, hottest short-lived relationship. But even we couldn't guess just how short-lived it was to be. It never even got off the ground. Why? Well, we're getting the feeling he's not a one woman kind of guy.... or a one man kind of guy either. From what our sources tell us, Cove and Thorn have gotten very close very quickly. They were spotted in the Inn just this past week petting, kissing, and whispering to one another. But Cove's also been seen spending quite a bit of time with Mist. Seems this is one playboy who has no intentions of changing his ways!

6.  He Likes His Women a Little On the Flat Side! The question has come up more than once over the past week as to exactly what is up with Harris. Who cares??? Really. Why are there so many of you out there that actually care that a bug crawled its way up his butt and died??? Seriously. That being said we here at the Den of Gossip were wondering if the dueling star (or, more appropriately, former star since he hasn't done anything of note since his return to the rings) is having trouble with his wife of forever and a day, Stick. Particularly since we're hearing word of late night sessions with Seirichi (or Sca-reechy as Barbie is prone to calling her) at the radio station in which they host a daily show. Long gone are the days when Seirichi/Sca-reechy and Harris were arch rivals. The two have definitely become friends... and maybe it's moving into something more??? Let's hope not. The pair of them are obnoxious enough on their own, they certainly don't need to combine their efforts to irritate!

5. How NOT to Make a Good Impression! The women of RhyDin are an amiable lot... for the most part. No matter how badly scarred and no matter how deeply deranged one might be, somewhere in RhyDin is a woman that will part her legs for you with the snap of your fingers. And she'll be more than willing to marry you and pump out a couple over achieving children within a month. So when we heard that there was a fairly good looking young man quickly pissing off the vast majority of women in this town, we were shocked! It seems that his name is Gaspar Marek and unless his sister, Julia, is present to keep him in line he is a handful and a half! Our sources tell us that Kitty had to take a stern tone with him when he was complaining about Amber taking off once her shift was over (presumably to get back to her husband) before he was served and then we hear that his attempts to win over the thorny landscaper, Yeardley, did not go well! Keep at it, kid! Chances are there will be one woman bowled over by your particular brand of.... charm.

4. Aaaaand Classiest Man In RhyDin Goes To.... Someone other than Hank! He may have a handsome fellow in a grizzly sort of way but a positive role model for the youth of RhyDin, he is not. He strutted his way into the Inn one night over the past week smoking.... well, something... and sporting a machete strapped to his back (really, isn't it about time for a weapons check, Panther?). Evidently, this guy has a name for his machete. It's Sammie, in case you were wondering. Anyway, biiiig shock, he heads in, starts drinking, and promptly gets into some sort of brawl with some masked woman that our interns couldn't identify. Our sources claim it seemed pretty nasty but in this town that could have just been foreplay. It broke up and Hank was overheard asking his boss, Audrey, for a couple days off to recover from it. She didn't sound pleased but gave it to him anyway. Can't find good help these days, eh, Audrey???

3. We Just Want the Hotties Shaking Their Money Makers! We've heard the rumors but the news has finally come down the pipeline! Three days! Seven stages! ONE HUNDRED AND ONE ACTS! Dragonpalooza is scheduled for the second weekend in September and we're already totally JACKED! That is going to be a weekend of insane amounts of merriment. Better take those dates off from work NOW. No word yet on who the bands will be but there are certainly rumors a plenty. But you know we here at the Den of Gossip NEVER report rumors only CONFIRMED truth. As soon as we get some verifiable band names, YOU will be the first to know!

2.  Seventy Times the Sparkly Goodness! This Sunday (July 22 at 8 pm) will mark the seventieth Diamond Quest in the Duel of Fists' Outback! Quite the checklist of active former winners are scheduled to appear in the tournament, including Sartan (three time Diamond), Seirichi (one time and current reigning Diamond), Mur (two time Diamond), Kheldar (six time Diamond), Ria (one time Diamond), and Harris (two time Diamond). There is also several entries looking to get their first Diamond Quest win and YOU KNOW that this one will be hotly contested for it's Hydra Cup points! Noticeably not on the list of entries is Old Man Simon himself but there's always a chance that the nine time Diamond will go looking for his tenth! It'll definitely be a show worth watching!

1. We're Starting To Lose Count. So in this week's NOT DEAD files, it seems that Collie MacLeod-Fenner is NOT dead.... and, yeah, we think this is one for the NOT DEAD file, not the UNDEAD file. Biiiig difference. Anyway! Collie was reported missing by her family several weeks ago and then there were rumors that a body washed up looking quite like her's. There was also some talk that her husband, the ever so shady Darien Fenner, was behind her disappearance and possible murder! Things had NOT been looking sunny in that marriage before her disappearance but it seems that this brush with death has changed all of that. They were spotted together in the Inn one night this past week hanging out together with friends (although we use the term loosely in Darien's case), including Aja, Yeardley, and Audrey. Collie was overheard saying that being told to come claim your dead wife's body can change your priorities. We wouldn't speak too soon if we were her. Give it some time. That dog will be right back to his old tricks!

Monday, July 9, 2012

Top Ten Things You Need to Know to Stay in the Know!

So were a couple days late. Sue us. Okay, no. Really don't sue us. Just enjoy what we have to share with you!

10. The bottled blonde dead man-stealer??? So evidently rumors of Jochin's death were greatly exaggerated because the moron has been spotted hanging around the Inn once again. Yeah, yeah. We know. There are more than a couple of women in RhyDin who were only upset about the news of his demise because they weren't the ones to end his life to begin with. Well, ladies, you still have your chance to get your revenge! Or key his car! Whichever! Aaaaand to make matters worse, he wasn't hanging out with longtime girlfriend, Harper, when our sources spotted him. Instead, he was supposedly seen with our dear Barbie's harasser and FAKE BLONDE bombshell (sorry, Barbie, she sort of is hot), Duci. The pair were seen leaving the Inn together in the VERY early morning hours. Really, I couldn't think of a pair more suited for one another.

9. Aaaand your first Hydra Cup Update! With the Hydra Cup just gearing up, dueling analysts and reporters are curious to find how the point system will function and which team will learn to work it best. So far, Beat Down is in the lead due, almost solely, to Seirichi. She may be obnoxious but the girl's a SWAGGER BEAST! Forces of Nature is coming in second and also has the most active duelists. There's no real team standout. Just some solid dueling across the board. The Crew is sitting in third at the moment and as is typical of the Crew, only two members have shown any activity -- Fio and Tical. Tical, in particular, was awfully hot this weekend. Great of Strength is in fourth and that's entirely due to Xanth since none of his other teammates have bothered to duel. From now on we shall call this team Team Xanth. And what's sad? Even if Team Xanth hadn't even bothered to show, they'd still be faring better than CrushBob who, with the exception of Tass, are dueling pretty dismally across the board. But don't look so sad CrushBob fans! There's still plenty of time for them to turn things around. Maybe Goon will come back and right this sinking ship!

8. Protip #299: Don't Piss Off the Half-Orc. While there were several challenges this past week, the one that everyone and their brother had circled on their calendar was the match between half-orc and Red Orc Brewery owner (the orc behind Badsider beer), Jake Thrash, and indisputable town idiot, Harris. Harris wasn't just content to mock the orc on the Outback's corkboard by calling him a 'cowardly gelded half-orc'. He took the trash talk a step further and was rumored to be the person behind the slashing of Jake's diamond portrait hanging in the Outback. If all of that wasn't bad enough, we hear that SOMEBODY drilled holes in every keg of Badsider in the building and let it drain dry. The smell alone must have been enough to get you drunk! Well, Jake let his fists do the talking. He beat Harris 5-1 in the first duel and 5-4 in the second and, thus, secured the right to hang onto Pathfinder.

7. Not even sunscreen will help you avoid this burn! Don't forget! Bonfire Brawl Night is being hosted in the Market Place Square this coming Wednesday night by the truly nutty Baroness of Old Market and current Firestar holder, Candy. The only good thing I can say is that at least they're abandoning the Outback for the night so we won't have to listen to 'burning down the Outback AGAIN' jokes all night. The festivities start at 9 and food and drinks will be provided! It's a great opportunity to see your favorite dueling stars and purchase foam fingers and knock off Hydra Cup team gear from the street vendors that you know will be their in droves. Have a blast! Drink some free booze! Maybe even get into a fight! Try to avoid getting burned!

6. Bring on the Barons and their Cookie-Loving Overlord! The first Government Advisory Council of Fio's second term will be held Monday, July 9, at 9 pm in the Great Hall! This will be the first meeting for new members like Audrey as well as the entire collection of barons and Chris Graziano. Political watchers are curious to see if the Crew (who has never really showed much interest in politics until bringing Fio into the fold) will make a strong showing or not. Also of note, Matt will continue to hold his citizen seat while his squire will sit in his Baronial seat. We're curious to see how much free reign Matt gives her or if she'll merely be there to support his positions! The meeting is open to the public so come on out! If nothing else, you'll get to see my handsome mug!

5. The babes of RhyDin never fail to bring the HAWT! We're hearing a lot of buzz about a gorgeous beauty named Lita that's been spending time in the Inn lately. In fact, our sources believe she's actually staying at the Inn currently. Of course this one has already been swept up by another new face in a guy named Cove. We have little details about the pair but one of our sources is reporting back an interesting scene from late one night this past week. It seems that Lita was hanging out with Cove and several of his guy buddies, including Mist and Tasriq, when Tasriq made some crack about Lita and sex. Evidently Lita was deeply offended but her new man kept right on laughing. This new relationship doesn't seem very long lived. This Cove guy seems way more interested in his bromances than the fact that he's dating a KNOCK OUT of a girl!

4. Sleeping her way straight to the top! It's common knowledge, of course, that G'nort's a moron. He's good at getting women, but not so good at keeping them. Aaaaand here's exactly why. Evidently his former model-girlfriend (and is there anyone out there who is surprised that G'nort is dating a model??? We didn't think so.) is interested in breaking back into the business so G'nort was overheard putting in a good word for her with Mrs. RhyDin Fashionista herself, Koy. Weeeell, it seems that Mercedes was none to pleased that G'nort was using his business and personal influence to get his girlfriend a job. Not that we think Koy would bite. Mercedes is more the type to be spotted in some men's magazine in that classic over the shoulder pose in a barely there bikini bottom while holding her boobs. High fashion runway model? We think not. Rumor has it that she left a goodbye note with her "platonic buddy" Cor to give to G'nort to let him know she was taking off on a business trip. Could we finally be seeing the cracks in the foundation of this relationship???

3. My girlfriend's back and we're gonna be in trouble! Katt's alive. Evidently. Sometimes, RhyDin, you blow our minds. Nobody really dies in this town. You can see their throat cut in the alley one night and a week later they're drinking booze and rubbing elbows with all the pretty ladies at the bar. So we suppose that we shouldn't be shocked by this latest return from the crypt case. Hoooowever, this death was awfully public and mourned by many. Rumor has it that news of her aliveness (it is a word now so SHUT UP) is just now starting to spread. No word yet, though, if Sergei has any idea. Particularly since he's been overheard mentioning that he's had a couple dates with Jet. We're quite curious to see if that's REALLY Katt and how this all unfolds. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY will Bon Bon Boutique be restored to its former glory???

2. A little inappropriate for the morning hour but still all sorts of fun! Ever heard of KLIT 900 AM? We hadn't until this past Thursday! But about 7:50 when the interns and I were fast asleep all snug in our beds, the news came in that KLIT was hyping up a new morning talk show. And after hearing who was hosting that new talk show we all we're up in spite of the UNGODLY hour! Whoooo do you ask can get Marc Franco out of bed before noon? Harris and Seirichi!!! Gone is the written version of Ringside Rewind and in its place is a weekday talk show from 8 until 10 featuring the pair of frenemies talking dueling, life, and pretty much everything in between. The town is totally buzzing with it! And, for the record, I am no longer the hardest working man in show business. I've been dethroned by the poor sucker who has the job of bleeping out every foul thing that comes out of Seirichi's mouth! That being said these two miss getting the number one spot on the Top Ten Things despite this new wildly successful radio show for LOSING THREE CHALLENGES IN THREE DAYS BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM! For Pete's sake, COME ON!

1. Is the elf getting a little big for his britches? There are leaks close to Locke and the Highlife Haberdashery gang that he will be opening a new store in the foreseeable future! This news hasn't even broken the fashion circles but straight from our ears to your inquiring minds, dear readers! Highlife Haberdashery has always been high end but has catered to RhyDin's upscale businessmen -- suits, ties, dress shirts. However, we're hearing that Locke wants to this new line to be equally trendy but more casual. Think expensive jeans, graphic t-shirts, leather jackets. ALSO, for years there's been a call for him to branch out of menswear to clothe more women than just his lovely wife and, if our source is on the money, Locke might just be ready to step on Koy's toes! We can't wait to see this play out!